Not Nearly Ready

So it’s Sunday morning and I’ve got slightly less than 24 hours before the last JTerm of my MDiv program.
Am I ready for this?
Pastoral Identity – Prep work done
Spiritual Formation – about 2/3 done
Biblical Capstone- ummm… Not so much

I’ve got a couple of loose ends that I need to handle for home and one or two for my internship

And there’s that partially written Chapel
Service for Wednesday. And the 3-hour drive from Milwaukee

It looks like a packed 24 hours going into a head-spinning two weeks.

I’m not nearly ready for this, and not just in the perpetually-behind-on-my-task-list way. There’s a bit of Senioritis kicking in, but that’s not it, either.

There is this nagging sense of not being nearly ready to say I’ve gleaned all I can from this opportunity to prepare. There are so many questions I have for my instructors. So many conversations I haven’t had with my classmates. So many resources I haven’t yet heard about.

Maybe I just dread the end of what has been a wonderful (if hard) season of having dedicated focus on learning. I really like college and I have loved seminary. I couldn’t imagine going on for more graded work at this point. But I know now that I don’t know nearly enough to say I’m done with exploring theology and Biblical languages and how to be part of God’s ongoing work in this world.

Nope – not nearly ready to be done. And I kinda hope I never am

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